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One Brilliant Family – Monique Doyle Spencer
My name is Monique Doyle Spencer. There are so many stories to tell but I decided that I would focus on what I think was most important to Joe, so let me start with Max.
Shortly after I first met Joe, he said, “I think Max’s first grade teacher has a crush on him.” And I said, “Joe, that sounds a little crazy” and he said “No, I think she has a crush on him and when you meet him you'll see what I mean.” And shortly after that he brought Max in to hang out at the office for a few hours and I met Max and I said, “Everybody has a crush on him – I have a crush on him!” and Max you drew me a picture Robot Man, which I still cherish…
Alex, I have followed every moment of your life from when you were a little girl. I went through your horse phase, um and then your father's incredible pride with the work that you were doing… and over the years I’ve gotten so sick of hearing about you both because you are the most perfect children in the whole world!
Max is the best writer in the world – hello!?
Alex is the best thinker in the world and is doing such important work and of course, they are both so good looking and everybody has a crush on them.
So we’ll be saying goodbye this evening.
Denise, I just heard about as just being brilliant and then last week I talked with an old colleague of hers named Ricky Dimino – I don’t know if he’s here – and he said, “Have you talked to Denise Breiteneicher in a while?” And I said “yes, very recently” and he said, “That is one brilliant woman!”
I understand also that some of Joe’s cousins have come. They’ve come from Ohio – they’re dressed in either red or blue, I’m not sure.
There’s Jan who is here with her son Owen, you can guess who they are because they look wholesome don’t they? Jan and Owen are here and Beth is here with Mike and Ellen is here with Jim, and Jim, which one are you? Which one is Jim? I know why he’s not raising his hand…it’s because you have to accept, now that Joe is gone, you dropped that ball in that game. He may have bowled you over, but you dropped that ball! When someone is in Heaven Jim….I’d just be mighty careful!
Sophia, I first heard about you when you were born because you were the most beautiful baby ever born (since Denise, Alexis and Max) and Joe loved to tell me about your drawing.
He also felt very fortunate in his in-laws and by that I don’t mean Marsha’s family. Although it is Marsha’s mom’s birthday – so happy birthday to Marsha’s mom. Bastille Day, Marsha’s mom’s birthday, these go together very well. But Joe really cherished his in-laws – Cabell, Steve and Amy – Amy, not that you’re officially an in-law and I’m not going to pry but you know, there’s a time and place for everything and Joe adored Cabell, Steve and Amy. And he could not have been happier that they became part of his family.
Many years ago, we were going to Joe and Marsha’s house for the first time and I asked Joe what Marsha was like and he just said “she’s my best friend” and that was all he needed to say about Marsha. What I learned from Joe in the last days of his life was that Joe did not spend five minutes of his life dying – his entire life was spent living and Marsha, I know you’re the reason for that.
Thank you for sharing him with us. Thanks.
Monique Doyle Spencer is an author and columnist for the Boston Globe.
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